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Jiglets: A series of sidesplitting gyrations reeled off—
Jiglets: A series of sidesplitting gyrations reeled off
IMPORTANT
Dear Reader:
While an artist has been engaged at a great expense to illustrate this volume of funniness, I want it distinctly understood that the illustrations are purely ornamental and are not intended to be diagrams of or keys to the jokes.
Between you and me, any one of the jokes – if you like it – is worth eleven times the price asked for the book. But, like the filigree work on a lemon merangue pie, the decoration may not make the pie any more palatable – but, it looks a whole lot better.
Confidentially yours,
JIGLETS
Ha! Ha! Ha! I am astonished. I didn't expect to find more than ten persons in the house to-night, and I see there are eleven.
I want to thank that gentleman in the first row – the man with the vigorous growth of hair. It's such a relief to see a man with some hair, in the front row.
Say, I don't think I ever told you of the time I went with a Shakespearian company to tour the New England States.
Never knew I was an actor? Why, of course.
Wouldn't have thought it? Neither would I, if I didn't know to what extremes a man of my attainments may be driven, when his bread-basket is empty.
Well, I signed for a hundred a week and all expenses.
I got expenses all right, part of the time, and had to employ one of Pinkerton's men to look after the salary.
Up to yesterday, he hadn't found it; but no actor who goes out of New York town ever expects to get any salary, and I didn't.
I played Hamlet, Egglet, Eyelet, Omelet and To Let.
Every time I played Hamlet, I got an Egglet in the Eyelet, and I saved them up and made an Omelet, which caused such a disturbance among the other boarders, that my landlady told me my room was To Let.