School Stories in English and Russian
Igor Yevtishenkov


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School Stories in English and Russian



Igor Yevtishenkov



Igor Yevtishenkov,2020



ISBN978-5-4483-2409-3

     Ridero




Learning the russianway


Moving over tothe window, Peter threw his wrapper into the bin and bit into the sweet. Injust aminute, the headache disappeared. Sugar helped, but Peter couldnt understand why he had tolearn complicated formulas with his other classmates. Inthe classroom he tried toquestion the beer-bellied teacher about the more difficult exercises, but the large man just smiled and said that it would help him one-day Weird!

Peter was tired, but his homework wasnt yet done. He wished that he could just answer some ofthe questions like can the residual oftwo figures be more than their sum, for example. It seemed so easy at first sight, but he was stuck on the problem for along time. He couldnt concentrate and soon his thoughts slid away somewhere else

Peter closed his eyes and relaxed inthe chair after his long day. He felt annoyed, but the reason wasnt his dull homework it was Mary, his classmate. She was cute, well educated and he enjoyed seeing her eyes on him, though it made him feel uneasy and this was when the bloody surged tohis cheeks. He didnt fancy her, even though she was different from other girls intheir class but the worst was that she knew it. Peter tried tohide his feelings and none seemed tonotice his reaction. He didnt want tobe friends with Mary, not yet. But being an acquaintance was okay for now. Or didnt he believe his true feelings? Peter did not want toanswer.

He thought about his last chat with Mary at school and sighed. Shed come up tohim with afriend, the red haired Natalie, who was rather cheeky and abit stuck-up.

Hi Peter, said Mary. Natalie rolled her eyes as if being hit byMike Tysons uppercut toherjaw.

Hi girls, said Peter, Hows things?

Okay, thanks, Mary replied. Natalie was holding her left elbow tightly. Ive got afew English Grammar questions would you mind if Ie-mailed them over toyou tonight?, she asked.

What? Tome?, he asked. He was surprised. He knew she had some private teachers from the UK and her English was far better than others. But she never asked for help. Notyet.

Sure! After all, who can explain English better than you?, Mary flattered him and raised her eyebrows.

Before he could think ofasuitable answer toher question, the girls were already bythe class next door.

It happened today and Peter thought it had something todo with the Maths lesson. Afew days ago, the Maths teacher well known alias Teddy Bear came into the class with awry smile and said, If any ofyou know how tosolve the problem during this lesson, youll get A-mark for the third school term and be let out early!. It sounded like ajoke and toPeter itwas.

Two ships are leaving piers from opposite river banks at the same time. They are moving towards each other, whispered Alex, his neighbor he was good at Maths and it was achallenge tohim. Both are moving at different but entirely steady speeds. They met for the first time, 720m away from the shore, but then moved away from each other again. Then each made aU-turn and began totrack back across the river, meeting the next time, 400m from the shore. What is the distance, therefore, between the river banks?, Peter wished he could find the answer, but tono avail.

Do you know what the answer is?, whispered Mary over the aisle.

Not aclue, answered Peter. He shook his head, not daring tolook up, but instead rested his chin inhis hands and pretended tothink. His cheeks once again burned red through his fingers.

No-one succeeded inthe lesson, but many ofthe class promised tohave an answer bythe following morning. Except Peter.

Peter e-mailed the puzzle toRobert, his friend inManchester, but had no reply as yet. Robert must have been pondering the answer as well, no doubt, but if he did know the solution, he would surely make contact. Peter moved the sheet with the problem away and focused on something else. He thought about his private school inthe Manchester suburbs. There were afew teachers who were helpful during the afternoon classes and helped pupils with their homework. He smiled as he reminisced about his time there. Mr.McDubley was really funny always blinking his eyes when Peter couldnt understand the Maths. Mr.Watersmith patiently explained the dull and boring grammar rules, but Peter never felt so desperate and exhausted as he did here inMoscow. Hes never been given so much homework, never. It was better inManchester before

Afew days passed and there was no lucky man tocope with the Teddy Bears problem inhis class. Even Alex failed. Teddy Bear exulted over them, many classmates were really upset, but Peter didnt care. He thought it was nonsense but not achallenge.

He had afew classbooks about Maths on his desk now, as well as two or three on History and Geography. Hed heard that there were more than twenty bydifferent authors on English grammar that had been approved bythe Ministry ofEducation unbelievable! those Russians are nuts about this stuff and they like toexaggerate. Inhis early days, he thought that there were exams for each class book, but was really surprised tofind out he was wrong. It was only one exam. He wondered how he could choose the right course totake and books topass the test successfully. All his efforts though were invain no-one could explain, simply relying on teachers knowledge, experience or simply ahit and miss answer Oh those Russians!

Peter came back tothe Maths again. Teddy Bear usually explained exercises for ten tofifteen minutes, as it took the other kids alittle longer tounderstand his speech. Two or three more exercises took them another twenty minutes why the hell did this man demanded afurther ten tofifteen more exercises for homework? Teddy Bear didnt care how long Peter spent on this boring work and nor did the other teachers. Each ofthem thinks theyre the Lord ofthe manor and the pupils are mere slaves. Ofcourse, they know more than the pupils, but homework always seems tobe more than the lesson why? Why should they do homework tree-four times longer than at school? Again, theres no-one toexplain.

Tomorrow theyll have six lessons, two ofthem would be PE. Alex told him once how long it would usually take todo this boring Maths shit. However, Alex was ageek one ofthe best inthe class, so Peter could only imagine the efforts that, Mary or Natalie, for example, would have togo through todo the same. Awesome. If they really tried todo homework theyd have todo it well into the night. And no night clubs and parties, ofcourse.

Peter imagined ateacher making all these exercises alone. He wondered if there was anyone who could endure it? Highly unlikely. He thought ofDads stories about his old good times when they had only one teacher. The man taught them all the subjects for the whole year and there was another one who inherited them inthe following one. Peter thought if there were such asystem inthis Russian school, the teacher would not be able togive them so huge home exercises. He simply wouldnt be able tocheck up the following day. Too much for one person. Even for Teddy Bear. Peter tried togauge how long it could take him tocheck up their exercise books. The result was shocking: three hours per each class daily. Five classes meant fifteen hours. It was impossible. Even if ateacher were agenius and were never tired, even if he could read faster than any ordinary person, even so he wouldnt be able tospend less than five-six hours per day for checking their home work. Without any coffee break and smoking! It was impossible toimagine. He understood now why his home works stayed unmarked so often. If they do not care ofwhat they ask for, why should we do then?, he sighed and fell tothinking.

It was China he reminisced about. Two years ago Dad convinced Mum togo altogether toChina. He had some partners over there and planned toset up abusiness with Government inthe South ofChina. It took him two years tounderstand it would be not so fast and his partners could not do all routine job without him. But life inChina was anightmare for Peter. Dad was crazy about his own childhood and the way he was educated inaJohn Deweys school. He wanted Peter tofollow his way. He made Peter work at afactory inChina for awhile. On Sundays. There was no air conditioning and the food was lousy, always. But Dad said Peter had tolearn life the way it was: no sugar, no sweets, just pure water, hard work and perspiration all over the body. The humidity was always 100% and the temperature was over 30Centigrade all the day long. It was adisaster. Peter barely survived. At school they studied six days aweek and almost ten month ayear. But there was no home work at all inthere. Strange. And now he was inRussia. Not much better but he had no perspiration every day at the very least. Dad said the future would belong tonuclear energy, and he was sure the Russians had some good ideas on that. Dad is avery smart man. But hes as stubborn as amule. So, he even convinced Mom toteach inThe University ofForeign Languages inMoscow tomove about.

Peter smiled and eyed another pile ofpapers. Damn, Geography! Inthe afternoon he hesitated about how tofill inthe maps and how tofind the coordinates ofsome cities and mountains. He didnt, however, now. He knew Google Maps would never-ever let him down. He entered the data and got the first reply. With asafe conscience he jotted down all the necessary latitudes and longitudes on the maps and gave astretch with delight. Even though he was against the boring homeworks he did not want toupset his Dad. Doing too much was not the right way tosuccess, he thought. Peter was tired. Hed be better off leaving all this behind now. He was thirsty and died for some tea. But he kept one eye on the monitor. There was aflickering envelope inthe right down corner. New incoming mail? His heart missed abeat. It was like email apnea. He could not say how but he was sure it was Marys email inthere. He clicked the icon. Damn, it washer!

Hi Pete, could you help me totranslate the text below, please? was number one inher list ofwishes.

H-m-m, she could do it herself But after looking through the pages Peter understood their English teacher alias Dragon was inavery bad mood today: the text was about fiber optic glass and its physical characteristics. How could they translate it from Russian into English? Even he could not For some time this job absorbed him and he did not notice the second question inthe message. After pressing the Reply All button he saw Natalies email inthe address line too. There were also afew words about it down there: Please, helpus with Natalie because she is my best friend and we wont translate the text without your help. Iowe ualot, Pet! My aunt! It was unfair. Peter wanted todelete the message but decided toscroll it down. And inthe end he found one more thing.

Peter, uknow, Ihave aproblem. Afriend ofmine asked me totranslate afew words for her. Could you have alook, please? Ill email you all the questions inthe second message, she was really ahoo lee as the Chinese used tosay. Acunning fox. He did not want tohelp Natalie but he did want tohelp Mary. They, women! What kind ofsecret did she want tokeep from Natalie but reveal tohim? He was intrigued. Peter didnt delete his message. He waited for awhile and all but pressed Send button. It was through. But another one appeared instead on the message bar. It was amail agent notification about one more incoming tohis second account. Peter chose download option. Inafew seconds it was on the screen. And it was from Mary. What could she hide from her best friend Natalie init?

Evening, Peter, she began inher Russian way. She was nervous for sure. There were too many mistypings inher second email. He smiled; she usually made alot ofthumbos when texting, too. Ihave avery unusual question toyou. You see, Ihave avery close friend. She lives inSaint Petersburg. We have been close since childhood. Its avery long story. But now she is introuble. She has aboy-friend inthe UK. They met at Malta last year. And unfortunately, she fell inlove. But he does not reply toher emails anymore. That guy even changed his Skype account and she cannot call him now. So, she wrote him averse. Could you be so kind tohave alook at her version that Ialso tried tocorrect alittle bit, please? Please, do not comment and no jokes. It is asensitive matter.

Peter smiled. He was obviously flattered. Marys words gave him quite athrill. He no longer thought why Mary kept this asecret though girls usually adored togossip about such stories. He felt the inspiration overwhelming him. Here, he began toread:

		No matter if its day or night,
		Your glance is no longer bright
		As it was seven days before
		But you are right: what is itfor?
		Why am Ibegging for akiss?
		Why do Iwonder if you miss?
		Why am Italking somuch
		And do not dare even touch?
		Who am Inow? Who areyou?
		Are two too many or toofew?
		If you dont love me, nor doI!
		And saying this Iwant tocry
		But if Ihate again tomeet
		Why feeling pain is so sweet?

		And nobody helps reply:
		Icant help suffering butwhy?

Peter fell into deep thought and entered his own world where time stood still. Even though there were very many mistakes inthe verse, it touched him. He was typing and thinking, and noticed nothing around him. His father knocked at his door twice and even half-opened it, but Peter did not turn around. Hard worker as Iam thought Dad and went back tohis room. Peter meanwhile kept on doing his unusual homework. Finally, he was through. He relaxed and read the lines from the very beginning:

		Effulgent day or stygian night,
		Your ardent glance, no longer bright
		As it was seven days before
		Pitiless pain! What is itfor?
		Why am Ibegging for the kiss?
		Why do Iwonder if you miss?
		Why do Idream and dare not touch;
		Yet, overwhelming fear Iclutch?
		Who am Inow and who areyou?
		Is two too many or toofew?
		If you dont love me, nor doI!
		My sin inblood-red tears Ivie
		But, if Ihate again tomeet,
		Why is this poignant pain so sweet?

		Beloved, this is my guttedcry:
		Icant help suffering butwhy?

Peter was satisfied. It sounded good and Marys friends guy is likely tobe surprised. Undoubtedly. Thats what they wanted and theyll get it. Email disappeared from the screen and dropped into Marys incoming box inthe north suburbs ofMoscow. She started when the speaker beeped loudly, and clicked the envelope icon with atrembling hand. As she was reading it brought tears toher eyes. She was looking at ayoung boys picture inher hands and whispered his name. It was the guy she met at Malta the year before. She could see nothing but his face and was quietly crying.

But Peter couldnt see it. He was far away. His throat was soaring. He wanted todrink. So, he rushed tothe kitchen. Mum and Dad waited for him over there.

Sonny, you look alittle odd, saidMom.

Yes, Iam, Peter agreed and smiled.

Was your homework so interesting?, wondered Dad with awitty smile. Iopened your door twice but you even did not react.

Oh, yes, it was. Youre right, Peter said with ahappy smile.

Itold you, he nodded toMum. He is clever and can adjust toany circumstances.

Sure, you did, smiled Mum. Like father like son.

Come on, honey, do not exaggerate, said Dad. Nowadays they have completely different homework. They know so much. Its fantastic. Ido envy them. And their homework must be also interesting.

Oh, yes, it is, Peter confirmed candidly. Iwish Icould have it always as much interesting as tonight!

All three sat around the table and began totalk merrily about their family matters. Everyone was happy inhis own way. The homework was done.




Teaching english at school or all is not gold that glitters


The mild and tender autumn wind hasnt yet turned into apenetrating and icy one. Air petted face and touched it as carefully and softly as if it was afraid offrightening it. Every next morning seemed tobe nicer and more charming than the previous one, and Andrey Ivanovich was fascinated with the golden days ofthat autumn. At the very least inthe mornings on his way from home tothe local school he has just begun towork for as an English teacher. As soon as he stepped across the schools threshold his mood has changed dramatically. Two months have passed and more or less the pupils got used tohim and his requirements. But, half ofthem didnt want tolearn, no matter what hedid.

Young Larisa Ivlev burst into blossom much earlier than any ofthe other eighth form girls. Meeting her inthe street, all made up inan abundance ofpaint and feathers, hed hardly recognize her as one ofhis pupils. Now, dressed up insome fashionable but cheap clothes like ayoung starlet she raised her brows high and her hair almost hid them. Her eyes, wide-open, were naive and sincere. If he hadnt known this girl before, hed say she was aVirgin Marys sister or her sister-in-law at the very least. She zipped her jacket down alittle so that zip-fastener stopped fifteen centimeters below collarbones. Until she stood straight, it was OK. Meanwhile Larisa leaned forward and planted her elbows on the desk. Her chin rested cosily inher palms. He was sitting at the desk and filling inthe class register. The girls and the boys stopped chatting and watched her out ofthe corner oftheir eyes; heads forward, idiotic look on their faces, hoodies and headsets inthe ears. He shook his head thinking his view was one-sided.

Andrey Ivanovich, she half-whispered half-curred inaseductive voice. You know, Ihave toadmit she made ashort pause like agood actress and went on, Ihavent done my home work, unfortunately. The last word was pronounced with so low and mourning voice that it took him all his power tostop laughing. He pulled himself up, anyway, and lookedup.

Thats really avery deplorable fact, he copied her intonation. My condolences But let me ask, Ms. Ivlev why did you fail todo it? he exuded charm.

Oh, that was avery sad story. But inshort, Iwas at ahospital.

Sorry. And how long did it take you? He was as kind and caring as her own father couldnt be at that moment.

Half aday. Why are you questioning about that? Did you see me somewhere?, she smiled with asilly smile many young girls used tothinking it makes them look more irresistible and intriguing.

No, Ididnt. So, you were back inthe afternoon, werent you?, he raised his brows and she let hers down.

Yes, Iwas. Idont remember exactly But youre right. Sortof.

Did you have dinner yesterday or did you miss it because ofthis unpleasant visit, Ms. Ivlev?, he asked with sympathy.

Yes, Idid. No problem, she leaned her head down toashoulder alittlebit.

Did you have your supper as well?, he kept asking.

Yes, Idid, Andrey Ivanovich. What are you implying? That Ishould be on adiet?, she pushed out her lower lip and gave adisgusted laugh.

No, not at all. But let me ask you the last question. Did you get tobed on time?

Oh, now Isee what youre getting at, she smiled openly. Yes, Idid. Alone and happy. Idreamt wonderful dreams, she began towhisper again. And Ieven dreamt about you. Imagine that..?

Id rather not, he narrowed his eyes and whispered inreturn. Icant find any excuse for you being so unprepared, Ms. Ivlev. Idont want tohear about your nice, long dreams. If you had time for sleep, you had plenty oftime todo your homework beforehand. Give me your assignment book, please.

Maybe we can talk about English inanother way? Why dont you call me Larisa?, she did not give up. She threw back her shoulders and athin line between two sides ofher zip opened up much wider than necessary. She arched her back and looked at him, raised her shoe-heel up waving it as abanner over her skirt-tightened buttocks.

Hardly we can, he said sharply and moved his head forward as if he wanted tolook into her eyes deeper.

Why are you looking at me like that?, she was embarrassed, obviously. She blushed but came back fast. The girl had too far gone tobe brought back that easily. What can you see inmy eyes, Andrey Ivanovich?

Nothing, unfortunately. However, let me have another look, he furrowed his brow, looking like he really wanted tofind something good inthere. Then apreviously unseen taste for sarcasm overcame him. Yes, Ican. Ican see the back ofyour skull and nothing else. Do Imake myself clear, Ms. Ivlev?

You are humiliating me!, she yielded. You are traumatizing my soul!.. You are trying topsyche me out!

Wow! You know such words! Its praiseworthy, he smiled.

Im telling my mother and our form mistress!

Its up toyou. You may report tothe Prime Minister or the President, if you like, but your assignment book should be on my desk right now. This morning Isaw you smoking with your classmates around the corner. One ofthem was Alex from the tenth form. He swigged from abottle ofbeer.

So what? Its none ofyour business!, she spoke out ofturn. He just gave awho-cares kind ofshrug.

Sure. However it confirms the fact you werent short oftime yesterday, or today. You should either get up earlier or go tobed later. And youd be better off studying than smoking, you know. So, theres no excuse. No mitigating circumstances. At that moment the headteacher came up tothe door and asked totalk tohim. He went out. The girls and boys didnt think he was close tothe door, so, they couldnt hear him coming back after his talk with the headteacher. But he could hear them.

He must be crazy. He talks too much. Iknow what todo myself. Hed be better off not teaching me. You smoke, you dont study, you cant read. Who cares what Ido? Im not his daughter. What the hell does he want?, this girl was bursting with anger.

Maybe hes asort ofdo-gooder?, another one asked.

What? Bollocks! Tell it tomy old aunt Fanny! There are no saints inthis world, my mother says. And she really knows such kind ofthings, believe me!, she couldnt calm down.

Ofcourse, she does! Weve heard all about her. Shes living with her nephew now, right?, the latter one said with apoisonous tone.

Ill kill you, you bitch!, the first girl screamed.

Spare yourself, stupid. Kill your Mom first and kiss my arse!, the other girl seemed so self confident. Andrey Ivanovich guessed who was who. Then the bell rang.

Hey, you, both, stop that! Right, whats the next lesson?, someone else stepped intointerrupt.

Biology.

Shit. Weve got tohurry. Come on, lets get out ofhere!

Adozen ofpupils swept away from the class and disappeared down the stairs. Andrey Ivanovich looked at the quiet classroom and began toprepare tothe next lesson. The sixth form was supposed tobe there inten minutes.

It was aremarkableday.

The sixth form guys were very excited with some PE exercises and could not calm down for along time. When they did, he sighed and repeated his standard phrase Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen!.. Invain. Ladies and Gentlemen! he increased his own volume: Good MO-OR-NING! Cut the noise and lets begin our wonderful journey. Who is on duty today?

One more lesson has begun. It was little different tohis previous lessons but there seemed tobe no sign ofimprovement either. So, my friends, hows things? Where have you been? What have you seen?, half ofclass began toshout loudly and he could not recognize aword. Lets begin with oysters, so tospeak, he smiled. Ms. Loginov, how are you?

Im fine. Thank you. And you?, achubby girl answered quickly. She got her face made up and athick layer ofMascara rested on her eyelids even though she was twelve.

Im fine too. Thanks. Tellus what your rest was like?, he wondered.

Pardon?, she asked inRussian. He had torepeat the sentence more slowly, Have you had any rest?

What Everest, Andrey Ivanovich?, the girl was completely confused. Iwas at dacha. Are you joking? Ive got no money for Everest!, she chuckled and he looked up expecting aloud laugh but nobody even smiled. My God, he thought, how can Igo on? And they are inthe sixth form now

Ms. Loginov, not Everest but any rest. Got it?, he tried toexplain her mistake with asad smile. Only then some ofher friends laughed alittle. He shrugged.

Half ofthe lesson has passed byand Yuriy Ilyasov, aquiet and an industrious pupil with thick-lens glasses, was desperately fighting against the army ofunknown words inhis text book. He joined this class last year and had studied inanother city until his parents moved toMoscow. Andrey Ivanovich patiently waited for him tomake mistakes and then corrected him. He turned his eyes for asecond but still kept listening tothe pupils reading and translating. Suddenly aword grated on his ears. He turned around and asked him torepeat.

Lord Baron, Yuriy said blinking his eyes.

What?, Andrey Ivanovich was surprised.

Lord Baron!, Yuriy repeated inan injured voice. Cant you see, Andrey Ivanovich, it is written is the text. Im reading it as it is!, he pointed out down tothe page with his finger. Andrey Ivanovich began tolaugh and the laugh turned into dry cough with tears on his eyes.

Yuriy, my dear friend, he whispered hoarsely, its Lord Byron. Havent you ever heard ofhim?

The boy shook his head. Andrey Ivanovich looked around the room. The guys and girls looked puzzled. He felt perplexed as well.

Hey, little monsters, no ideas?!, he raised his brows and waited. No-one replied. He nodded and sighed. OK, just for your information Lord Baron as you said, he pointed out toYuriy, or Lord Byron was the greatest English poet. He shrugged indisbelief and asked the next boy togo on with the text. Aquiet voice began toread the next sentence, and he sat listening toit. Ten minutes left before the bell rang but that was not the half ofthe story, though. The pupil read the sentence abit disconnectedly and finally has begun totranslate. He was slow but OK. The first half ofthe sentence took him two or three minutes and the second part was supposed tokill the rest ofthe lesson time. The boy mumbled tohimself before speaking loudly and finally said, The Queen Charlatan was presented, he sat thinking about something nobody but him could know about. Andrey Ivanovich opened his mouth thunderstruck with the translation and asked What? What did you say?

Queen Charlatan was presented, the boy was embarrassed but he could not understand his mistake Whats wrong?, he asked inan offended voice again.

Buddy, its written Charlotte. Can you pronounce inRussian Sharlotta? Hey, you, class, have you heard the name before?!, he looked at them. No one nodded.

Andrey Ivanovich, is that different tosay Sharlotta or Charlatan?, the offended boy wondered. It sounds very similar. He was quiet and sincere. There was no joking inhis voice.

Not that much indeed, Andrey Ivanovich smiled. Charlatan, shalopay, scapegrace, who cares? Its similar tosharmanka and sharlatanka. Right? The class burst into laughter. OK, guys and girls, not much time left. Lets sort out homework. He could not stand it anymore. But he had to. Life was supposed togoon.

December saw the first meeting with parents at school and it wasnt easy. Not for the parents but for him. He had been told the pupils parents mostly considered aschool as atemporary shelter, alodge for their children from 8.30a.m. till 2.00p.m.Pure and simple. He thought, however, that some may feel differently and have an understanding ofwhat hedid.

Initial greetings and smiles didnt seem tomatter much tonight, even though he felt that afirst impression was the most important thing. He didnt know what impression the pupils parents had, but his own wasnt agood one. Tired, estranged faces with empty eyes, wooden stares and some unclear sounds like sighs or indistinct mumbles were inthe air. And dark hopelessness from the thirty or so adults simply spoilt the atmosphere. They listened tohim and nodded, mostly insilence. Some women tried toencourage him, smiled then sank back into their immovable detachment again. Andrey Ivanovich despaired, but went on describing the way their kids learnt English and every pupils virtues and shadows but nobody seemed tocare even when it concerned their own child.

We try tolearn some more or less common things, for example, ingeography. But they know little about these points inRussian, let alone inEnglish, he tried toexplain why the kids were not so successful. For example, Ms. Ivanova said we could go toLondon and Washington bytrain. Can you imagine that? Ms. Ivleva sincerely thinks Dali and Deli are two brothers from ablockbuster film. Great Britain and England are two different countries. One is inEurope and the second somewhere inthe hell. UK and theUS are OK, they think. You see, alack ofbasic knowledge is scary and itll be difficult for them toget tothe airport, let alone aforeign country.

Ha! awomans voice interrupted him. Well never get tothe airport cause our salary is only enough toget tothe closest bakery!, apparently it was her mother. Some nodded with sympathy. Andrey Ivanovich was stunned. There was nothing more toadd. How could he dare call their children brain-dead, beer-addled or an airhead? What acheek! It wouldnt be unfair on their parents though

Next morning it was bright and fresh. 6.00a.m. and the coffee machine has begun tospread its charming aroma around the room and even though he knew hed be better off without caffeine, the delicious coffee smell made him feel good. He couldnt refuse acup ofcoffee that morning. He narrowed his eyelids, sipping the black liquid with pleasure and thinking ofthe pupils. The tenth form ones seemed tounderstand the Sequence ofTenses and Present Continuous Tense. The previous grammar rules werent as difficult topractice. However, PCT was more difficult tograsp and hard tocompare with something similar inRussian. There was ashort advertisement for bed-linen on the TV with anaive love-story plot. He took apen and jotted down afew sentences:

		Ive been gazing at thedawn
		Ive been staring at yourgown
		Ive been looking at the street
		Where we failed tobrieflymeet
		Ive been watching stupidad
		With two gorgeous girls inbed
		Ive been wasting precioustime
		Cause time wasting is acrime
		And Ihave tosay again
		Iwas suffering invain

He opened his laptop and switched on the TV card. Ten minutes later the commercial was on again and he recorded it onto his hard disk. Great! Practice makes perfect, indeed. The lines he wrote didnt seem good, but werent bad, but he hoped they were different from the books long and boring explanations anyway. His pupils were supposed toenjoy them.

The lesson began with alot ofjokes, smiles and laughter because it was one girls birthday. This definitely didnt fit the general mood. They didnt listen carefully, and Andrey Ivanovich forced himself tocarry on. He stopped explaining grammar and tried tosmile. His idea toattract their attention with his brilliant advert poem failed, and it hurt his feelings. The girls sitting at the front desks often turned around tochat and bythe middle ofthe lesson they hung onto the backs oftheir chairs. Low-slung jeans slipped down below their coccyx anew kind ofteens fashion and the T-shirts and short blouses hiked up at the back. He had agallery ofthe violin-like waists with half-naked hips and S-vibrating spines. All ofthem had tramp-stamps the-state-of-the-art lower-back tattoos, which they ensured can be seen bywearing ashort top and low-rise pants. There were dangerous scorpions, bizarre flowers, falling rose-leaves over agirls languishing gaze, something else and two men feeding coal toastove tokeep it going. Both men were supposed toactively shovel when the picture owner would pick up her feet nicely.

Girls, listen, he tried toattract attention tohimself. Could you be so kind toturn around, please? Some looked around and stopped their chatter. You know, your picturesque tattoos made bymodern Gogens, Rafaels and Da Vincis, have nothing todo with our lesson. Believe me, it is much more pleasant totalk toyou than toyour second faces, so tospeak, he chuckled.

Andrey Ivanovich, if Itranslate correctly what youve just said you dont like our tattoos, one smiled. But they are both very beautiful and expensive!, she pouted her mouth and rolled her eyes meaningfully.

Its not really my field, he replied, however these masterpieces have less meaning than your look now, he wanted toput her back into her place but she reacted immediately.

Excuse me, her voice was bitter as she could make it, what do you think we should do then? Should we tattoo acrossword or Pythagoras theorem down there? And who for? For Isaac Newton or Perelman?, she gave along laugh and the class seemed tosupport her. Sorry but you can hardly understand the deep meaning ofeach tattoo. The girl flicked their hair and grinned more inanely than before. They might have forgotten they were at school. Seemingly all ofthem were happily indifferent rather than actively hostile.

Youre right, Iknow, but Iguess Im just old and cant understand whats fun about it, he had toavoid the more difficult part ofthe conversation. But, Im happy that you know these artists names. At least thats something.

We dont. Weve only just heard ofthem, so who are these people?, she gave an I-dont-care shrug ofher shoulders, and they all gave aknowing laugh. He felt uneasy. He tried his best toopen up the world hes seen and known although it was vain, he knew secretly he could give them more than others.

No the slightest, girls, he answered with the same intonation. Naturally, it made no sense tocontinue with the lesson. Although afact may sound interesting toyou. They all stopped talking and he could finally see their faces instead ofthe backs. He thought that they liked tolisten tohis stories, which pleased him, but he knew he was wrong ingeneral, so that was agreat disappointment. Around your age, we celebrated agirls birthday at her house Later that evening, we all decided tomake awish, so tospeak. And eighteen out oftwenty ofus, had the sameone.

Which one? he was immediately asked.

It may sound alittle odd toyou, he made asmall, but not deliberate pause as thoughts ofpast events filled his head. But we only had one wish, which was let it be anything but war. Thats all. He could see their expressions fading, but hed predicted that already.

Maybe this was the only problem during your time, one boy politely asked as an excuse for their lack ofcompassion.

Perhaps. But what do you wish for? Allow me todo ashort test just afew questions. Ill dictate and you just answer, marking your responses with one, two or three. Okay? The first question what is your biggest wish? The second question Who would you most like tolook like? Thirdly, how much money do you need tobe completely happy for the rest ofyour life and what do you actually need tobe happy? Lastly, but byno means least, he smiled, what attributes must you have tobe successful nowadays. He sat back down at his desk. Adeep silence hung inthe air and everyone had their heads bent over their answer sheets. He took his thermos and took along swig. His coffee was cold, but still good, proving it was worth paying extra for Lavazza. Half an hour later, the test was over and the bell rang. All his pupils left the classroom with embarrassed smiles, but not looking directly into his eyes. It was as if theyd got into mischief and were afraid ofbeing punished bytheir parents. Having looked through the sheets he thoughtfully ran ahand through his hair and opened adrawer.

Bythe seventh lesson all classes had answered the same questions and he put their replies on the table tosortout.

Hello can you hear me?, he listened tothe voice and couldnt help but smile again. No-one else would greet him like this on the phone.

Good afternoon, Anna Ilyinishna, he said. How are you? Are youOK?

Oh, nice tohear your voice, little Andrew, she switched toEnglish, Ihavent heard from you inages. Thanks for your concern. Whats up? Why are you calling?

Anna Ilyinishna, you are impossible. Cant Icall just for achat?

No, you cant. So, what do you want?

You see, er Im ateacher now.

My condolences, she commented. He simply sighed.

Istarted teaching inSeptember and tried tomake my pupils interested inEnglish any way Icould Idid my best totell them what they could achieve providing they sat and learned for their last two years at school, but tono avail. More importantly, theyre from troubled families, theyre disadvantaged children, so tospeak. Iasked them what theyd want tohear about Paris, London, Taipei, Berlin, Frankfurt, Vienna, Beijing, Shanghai, but even this prompted no reaction from them. Isaid, Right, boys and girls. How do you think people get toknow each other inChina, the UK, France or Germany? Silence absolutely no reply at all. So, Idecided togive them ashort questionnaire. The first question was what they dreamed about, the second, what theyd need tobe completely happy intheir lives and the third, who theyd like tolook like.

Hmm. Ican tell you what they answered without hearing your results, Im afraid.

Really?, he was unpleasantly surprised.

Ofcourse. They need nothing and dont care. Youre going toattempt tochange their path toabetter life and tohelp change them.

Er Sortof.

What Ido understand, is that neither you nor Ican do anything tochange them. One or two will be okay byour reckoning; others will learn nothing, read nothing and do nothing but play games and waste time. So, theres nothing left for them towish for or actually need. If they dont need education, books or touse their brains, it doesnt necessarily mean they need nothing. Mostly, they do what theyre asked tobyparents or other adults. However, adults dont usually ask for anything, because theyre tired, so the only wish they have is toget some peace and quiet from the kids inthe evening. So, if they dont need towash, cook, scrub or dust as these functions are performed byconsumer electronics, what could they wish for? Humans go back tobeing simple animals without having ambition.

Do you want me tolist their ambitions?, he asked, sounding puzzled.

No, not at all. Just give me the one thats common through all ofthem, she asked it as quietly as when shed taught him many yearsago.

Hmm he pondered, Id say that its money all their ambitions surround having lots ofmoney and having it could make their ambitions real. Ha! Thats allus adults think about too!, he added with anote ofsarcasm inhis voice.

Youre right. Idare say that its become auniversal requirement, hasnt it? Look, my feelings about money havent changed dramatically over the last twenty years but (!) now Im far happier when Ireceive money instead ofabook or abox ofchocolates from my pupils. Whether you admit it or not, it lets everyone buy their slice ofthe happiness pie.

Idont understand where youre going with this, Anna Ilyinishna, he sighed. Im confused. Itried my best toteach them abetter way, but Ive failed. It looks as if were from different planets, but none ofthem will succeed inbusiness without acertain level ofknowledge. They all dream about having money, without the responsibility ofajob. Im beginning tosound like my grandparents sounded tome when Iwas apupil. They never mentioned money though and you do. Do you really think that money is the root ofall evil?




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   ,     (https://www.litres.ru/book/igor-yevtishenkov/school-stories-in-english-and-russian-21432384/)  .

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